Vegan Spinach and Artichoke Quiche

Big news this week, your very own foodie is a FINALIST in the Great British Vegan Bake Off through the PETA website! I entered my vegan chocolate and peanut butter fudge brownies in the online competition and have been selected! It is such a huge thrill to be recognised in this way and here’s the link to vote.
http://blog.peta.org.uk/2013/10/the-great-vegan-bake-off-the-finalists/#.Umlgo9-8xQo.facebook
Even if its not for me, there are some delicious entries, please take the time to vote if for no other reason than to raise awareness of just how good vegan baking can be. In the wake of the amazing news I decided to do some more baking but of the savoury variety. I spotted this recipe through Pinterest and decided to change it up a little. It seems really daunting from the recipe but honestly it really isn’t that bad, it’s more a lot of faffing about than anything difficult. So should you wish to fart around in the pursuit of an impressive party dish here’s the list of all the things that could go wrong 😛

What you need:
For the crust:
– 40g Rolled Oats
– 3 tbsp sesame seeds (toast these and the oats under the grill before you start until…they look toasted I guess)
– 1/2 tsp baking powder
– Seasoning
– 100ml Almond Milk (milked from real almonds by midgets, their tiny hand are perfect for the tiny almond nipples)
– 50ml Olive oil
– 120g of Plain Flour (Wholemeal is the best)
For the Filling:
– 1-2 tbsp olive oil
– An onion size onion
– 2 garlic cloves
– 1 pack of spinach
– 450g firm tofu (don’t be alarmed at how gelatinous it is believe it or not that actually IS firm tofu, I’ve never bought non-firm I dread to think what it looks like)
– 120ml Almond milk
– Basil
– 1 jar of artichoke hearts in oil (canned in water will do but are much less flavoursome I find)

Once you’ve gathered all the ingredients and payed the midgets for their services. Put the oven on the 200 degrees, or forget and wait till everything’s ready, realise you’ve forgotten swear and stand there waiting or the oven to heat up at the end. Either’s good. Then it’s time to make the pastry. This pastry is brilliant because it’s very crispy and doesn’t need to be blind baked so in that sense it actually cuts down on the faffing about.
1.) Put all the pastry ingredients apart from the oil and almond milk into a processor and blend until finely ground.
2.) Put in a bowl and add the milk and oil. Get your hands all sticky by kneading it into a ball.
3.) Press the pastry into an oiled quiche tin, you can try and roll it out but it is very difficult as its not the usual doughy consistency and can break apart. Then stick it in the fridge.

4.) Cook the onion and garlic until oniony and garlic-like and add the spinach until soft and slimed.
5.) Put in the blender with the tofu, milk, seasoning and basil. Add the artichokes and blend gently so the mixture is still slightly chunky.

6.) Pout the purée into the crust and bake for 25-35 minutes.
7.) Don’t panic it probably won’t be set when it comes out as it needs to cool down so leave to stand for 10 – 15 minutes.

And there we have it a tasty quiche like tart with wonderful flavours. It really is one of the more accomplished things I’ve attempted on this blog and it works really well 😀
Even the meat eaters liked it but did proclaim it was a perfect ‘starter’… I guess to some people it’s not a meal without meat and you know what I used to be one of them so no judgement here.
So enjoy wether it’s a starter, your lunch or part of a festive feast, just spare a thought for all those hard working milking midgets!
Happy scoffing.
The Foodie
Xxx

The Bristol Stool Tart

Those of weak disposition (or sense of humour) look away now! Those who remain BEHOLD the Bristol Stool Tart!

It was my best friend Heather’s birthday a couple of months ago and I decided to make her the ultimate fart and poo joke cake to suit her sense of humour. In nursing we have something called the Bristol Stool Chart which is a measurement system for your poo. Wether they look like rabbit droppings or a mud slick there is a number on the chart for us to keep up to date with your arse, I know…what a glamorous life one does lead. (We aim for a three or four if your worried about your daily/hourly/weekly/whenever-it-happens poo)

So I combined the pooey system, which really is a good chuckle to read, with delicious cakey goodness to create this tasty repulsive treat. Many a friend said they wouldn’t eat it, which is a shame as it was actually really tasty, but the nurses of the group couldn’t get enough of it. So much so that the, probably fairly normal, people NOT wanting to eat a shit cake were rendered the weirdos of the
party. Nothing like sticking together.

Unfortunately it’s not vegan but it was healthy, as it had no butter or oil and half the sugar of a normal cake….but then I covered it in chocolate…so yeah probably not THAT healthy either.
So give it a go if you think you’re hard enough, or your friends stomach is strong enough.
I call this cake an education into cake and poo…and after all they really do make the world go round.
Happy Birthday Heppa bear.
The Foodie
X

Vegan Tomato and Garlic Bisque

So my main issue since I’ve been trying this vegan thing is snacking. I have struggled to find anything that isn’t fruit or vegetable to snack on that’s satisfying and healthy (any suggestions welcome. One of my favourite things to snack on is soup but I could not believe how few soups are vegan! It’s so shocking the things they put in them! The only couple I could find we’re either really expensive or full of chemicals so I decided to make it myself.

 

I had lots of tomatoes left from making my pasta salads for lunch (recipe to follow soon) and so I fried off a red onion with three cloves of garlic, two tablespoons of olive oil and added the tomatoes, about 450 to 600 grams. I let it cook for a while then added some vegetable stock and a shit load of black pepper, this might not be ideal for everyone but I can’t get enough of the stuff.

 

 

Then I put it in a blender with some salt and blended until completely smooth. I know some people are going to criticise the fact I didn’t take the skins off the tomatoes but their is logic buried in my madness. Tomato peels contribute a high concentration of the carotenoids found in tomatoes, so if you want your tomato dishes to be as rich in vitamins and minerals as possible stick it out with the skins! It comes out as quite a thin soup but the taste is phenomenal and it really does keep you satisfied when your feeling a bit snack-ey. Plus I’d much rather have a thinner soup than chuck in lots of unhealthy cream or milk to push up the calories, dilute the flavor and sit in my bowel for a week. 

 

So it’s healthy, nutritious, tasty and it works out at roughly 60 calories a cup so it’s good for the waist line too. Over all i’m pretty happy with this for snack time. 

I’m discovering the trick to nailing this vegan thing is to never let yourself feel like you’re going without any thing. So far I’m definitely feasting not fasting.

Happy eating.

The Foodie

xxx

 

Vegucated

I will be watching this, even the advert was very inspiring to me x

It’s Fun to Say Goulash!

I had grand plans this week of a decedent Indian curry with lashings of Tarragon and saffron and fresh chicken and then I realised that I’m a student and don’t crap money so settled on a Goulash. It’s cheap and flavour full but mostly because it’s fun to say Goulash.

I took a recipe buuuut I pretty much ignored most of it so it would be pointless to share it. I took a pork loin and trimmed the fat off and cut into cubes which was quite time consuming but it saved so much money on the meat to do it myself rather than buy pork loin steaks to do the exact same thing. I used a shit load of paprika, some cinnamon, chilli powder, mixed herbs and parsley and marinated the pork for about half an hour. Fry it with an onion, until it’s browned, chuck in a tin and a half of chopped tomatoes let it reduce down a bit then add a couple of tins of new potatoes (or fresh if you have that thing I hear about called money). Then just leave to simmer until it tastes right and the porks cooked 🙂 really simple.
I wouldn’t add any salt until the end as the pork really is quite salty so there is a danger of over salting it which I nearly did.

But yeah it tasted great really rich and exciting considering how simple and cheap it was to make. I serve it with rice and natural yoghurt just to make it more substantial as there really isn’t that many calories in it upon my, probably vastly inaccurate calculations. I call it optimism.
GOOOOOUUUUUULLLLLASH! It really is fun.
The Foodie
Xxx

No-Faff Fish

So today I got sent home early from university so actually had time to cook myself a proper lunch rather than throwing a handful of Cherios and an artichoke in my bag as I’m rushing out of the door in blind panic. So I decided to make myself some nice crispy fish. I took two defrosted fish fillets (supermarket brand thinking of the pennies) and coated them in some maggis crispy chicken bread crumbs. I know the clues in the name and it’s actually for chicken but I have used it with fish before and the lemon and crunch really adds to the flavour. That said I always add extra parsley to it just to really make it compliment the fish.

I didn’t use egg to coat the fish and create the crust I just sprinkled it over the top’ I say I do it “to avoid unnecessary cholesterol” in truth it’s just laziness and to avoid faffing about. To top it all off I sprinkled a generous handful of pine nuts over the fish in the baking tray so I could have some nice toasted pine nuts.
Mind you I use them sparingly cause I nearly swallowed my tongue when I saw the price of them when I was making a stir fry…they were more than the MEAT! But they are so bloody good they’re nice for a nice healthy treat every now and then, especially toasted.
So bollocks to the ladies who lunch, I quite enjoy being a lady (debatable) who cooks her own 🙂
The Foodie
Xxx

Skinny Bitch Caesar Turkey Burgers

So after two weeks of excess up t’north, which consisted of mainly pie and beer, I thought maybe my belly could do with some shrinking. In fact it’s got so bad I was eating cottage cheese and carrots for my lunch….I know, judge me! So I took this recipe off the BBC Good Food App under the Healthy Cook book and did some skimpy student changes.
I used minced turkey thigh meat against recipe instructions as it’s much meatier, juicer and in all honesty much cheaper than normal turkey mince and it’s still just as healthy. I bulked the meat mix out with a hell of a lot of onion as well so the same amount of meat for four burgers made six instead, plus a burger isn’t a burger with out onions 🙂 This worked really well as the onions added texture and crunch to the burger making it much lighter all round.
The caesar dressing was a big challenge for me and I’m ashamed to say I failed by simply using too much lemon, it certainly didn’t taste bad but it did taste more like a lemon dressing. In fact when I first made it it was so tart my face nearly turned inside out! I followed the recipe to the tiniest detail so I really don’t know why that happened but perhaps I juiced a little to enthusiastically? Still it was a very tasty dressing none the less.
When they were assembled they just looked lovely and tasted just as good as a beef burger to me. It’s also the first time I’ve had a burger without cheese and not missed it. So an all round winner but I need to work on my over enthusiastic juicing skills.
The Foodie
Xxx
P.s. yes I am eating it off a chair….we don’t have a dining room table because I now sleep in the dining room lol we’re crammed into a student house :p

Some Good Food Looks Like Throw Up

An interesting hypothesis I’m sure you’ll agree, and I’m sure it caught your eye!
I was listening to a couple chatting in a restaurant the other day and after being rude to the waitress, obnoxious about the decor and just engaging in general twattery they began to criticise the food. Now I was eating the same dish he was eating and it was beautiful, loaded nachos with chilli, guacamole, cheese and lashings of refried beans and sour cream, lovely balance of flavour and spice and very decadent and naughty…I was happy as Larry. But apparently according to this “Made in Chelsea” looking fucker you “eat with your eyes” and this food just looked like puke.

Now granted it sort of did (example above) lol however it does not take an anatomical genius to figure out that we most certainly do NOT eat with our eyes! It is by far the most irritating form of food snobbery going. I know everyone’s obsessed with putting soup into little towers and drizzling tiny drops of sauce in the shape of the Mona Lisa but frankly I’d rather they stopped faffing on and focused on flavour. It also astounded me that this man had come to a Tex Mex restaurant for bloody gourmet food art, I can’t help but assume that’s certainly not how it’s done in Texas…or Mexico. But it did get me thinking, I am pretty sure all my favourite foods look a little bit like throw up!

I mean sticking with Tex Mex theme who doesn’t like a good chilli, nothing better than slapping some of that on a pile of rice and yet it reminds me of the sound of something else slapping onto the tiles. Speaking of rice Indian food couldn’t get any better but looks the same going out as going in.

Or there’s always the creamy cheesy pasta and sauces that I slop onto my plate by the bucket load, but I’d better not use the same bucket as when I’m ill otherwise I would notice a striking resemblance. Tastes utterly divine yet my eyes if I’m honest wouldn’t enjoy it nearly so much, perhaps partly due to the searing pain I’d be in trying to blink a pasta bake into my system. What an idiot!
So basically I’ve intensely put you off your food by talking about some of my favourites 🙂 happy days!
I do have to admit working as a student nurse I do go from doing the most horrendous things straight to eating my sandwiches with barely enough time for a good hand scrub so it does take a lot to put me off my food, I just don’t quite think every dish I eat has to be exquisitely modelled on Mary Antoinette’s breast for crying out loud.
All I’d say it don’t be put off cooking cause you’re worried about how it’s going to look because no matter what the Michelin star chefs say your family, friends and you are the ones eating it every day and frankly I don’t think they’ll give a shit.
Down with food snobbery, up with stuffing our faces!
The Foodie
Xxx

Great Geordie Sausage Casserole

Great sausage casserole, not just sausage casserole, GREAT sausage casserole, a la hairy bikers. If your from across the pond and don’t know what The Hairy Bikers are then the name says it all. They’re hairy bikers that cook, they’re also Geordie which means they hale from the tropical paradise of Newcastle, which is about twenty minutes away from my hometown.
It’s not going to win any beauty contests but by god it’s bloody good!
The best thing about sausage casseroles is that you can use cheap sausages and just about get away with it, though of course it’s always better to use the hearty farty posh ones that students like me can only dream of.
This casserole was amazing! Such a massive punch of saltiness from the bacon with the sourness of the tomatoes and the richness of the butter beans just creates an amazing flavour!
It says to serve it with rice but I ate it with Cous Cous as the butter beans and rice would have been too heavy on my palate and the Cous Cous takes on the delicious flavour in the sauce.
So yes buy the cook book if you haven’t already the hairy bikers certainly know a good casserole. It’s tasty, easy to make and gloriously British 🙂
The Foodie
Xxx

Market Fresh Fish Pie

So I’m on my break for Easter and back in the North at home with my mum and decided since she takes such good care of me that I’d blow the bank at the local fresh market and make a really good fish pie.
So I took a recipe from the fabulous Mr.Ramsey, who I perhaps like a little too much FYI, and adapted it to fit my slightly more rustic cooking style. I know people most say that to excuse lumpy mash and roughly chopped vegetables but I really prefer to play with the texture of foods. I was supposed to strain all the fennel and onion out of the sauce but I left them in mostly because I like the texture and body it adds to the sauce. I also used the sauce to make the mashed potato instead of milk which created a lovely smooth creamy mash.
I bought haddock, cod and prawns fresh from my indoor market, I nearly peed myself when he told me how much it cost but my mother is most definitely worth it and I have to admit the taste was worlds apart from my cheap student frozen fillets.
I served it with roasted green beans wrapped in bacon, I’ve always preferred roasted vegetables simply for the crunch, the more I write the more I realise how much texture influences my cooking.
All the ingredients were bought fresh from my local market and I can’t believe the difference the in the quality and flavour, even down to the potatoes and the service from the market workers was so helpful and friendly. It also made me feel brilliant as I think it’s so important to support local businesses wherever possible especially when times are hard.
I never like to wax lyrical about my own cooking I’m not that cocky but I was really happy with the meal and it was so beautiful to see my family gathered together enjoying a meal that I cooked.
Food is a celebration and this meal was the perfect celebration of being back together with my family.
The Foodie
Xxx